Saturday, June 04, 2011

Is it Monday Yet?

It's official--the worst week I've had in a while has been crowned by the worst weekend.  Surprise bills, dental work, angsty kids, dead fridge and now, a neighbor I'd like to drop kick into the next county.

Since the lovely gentleman doesn't even know my name, I feel free to vent.  Last Fall, he replaced a retaining wall that tore our side yard to shreds.  It was a nightmare for days and days and days.  A loud, messy mud pit that resulted in our master sprinkler box being crushed by the same back hoe that damn near slid into the house.  His crew finally fixed the box, but not before our water bill went up by a hundred big ones.  To polish the project, he literally tossed down a few sheets of sod and that was that.  All these months later, with half of our side yard still dirt, I figured it was high time his team finish their job. 

I just caught him outside and asked very politely, when he had a chance, could he please have one of his crews--there are at least half a dozen each week--finish sodding our side yard.  Here's how that conversation played out:

"What's wrong with it?  There's as much grass as there ever was."

"Sir, with all due respect, before, there were at lease green weeds to mow.  Now, there's only dirt."

Big sigh.  Huff.  Stomp.  "It looks better now than it ever has."

"Yes, but half our side yard is dirt.  When we allowed you to tear our yard apart, you promised to make it right.  This isn't right."

"Fine.  Whatever.  I've got to have work done next week.  I'll have'em do it."

"Thank you."  I turn to head into the house.

"Those vines are ruining your house.  You need to take them down."

"I like them.  They add character."

"They're ruining your house.  Gonna make your roof leak.  If that's what you want . . ."  Big shrug, huff and bonus sigh.

"That's what I want.  Thanks."

I'm sooooooo angry.  Why do people have to be this way???  Seriously???  I thought I might make the tail end of the ladies' weekend I've been planning to attend literally all year, but at the rate this week has gone, I'd crash and burn on the toll road. 

Instead, I'm off to mix a nice adult beverage, plop down in my big, green chair and focus on wishing for my neighbor to vanish from my life and prosper elsewhere.  Oh--and did I mention he had no shirt on?  Yum--NOT!!!!

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